Children on Stun

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felch

Oh doctor, can you make me any better?

 

I've tried the cold showers but my dreams are getting wetter

 

She's a crinoline scream from a saucy magazine

 

But I'm 48 and she's barely 16

 

She's a friend of my only daughter

 

I tried it on once but I know I shouldn't ought to

 

My wife thinks it's obscene

 

That's why she's leaving me

 

She went back to her mothers

 

Can you help me with a remedy?

 

 

 

Care in the community

 

Can't you give lust immunity?

 

The only advice that I can give

 

Try celibacy and Anadin

 

 

 

Oh Christ, I've tried to forget her

 

But the pills won't cure her tight little sweater

 

The merest thought of her makes it difficult to dance

 

If I wasn't so old I'd take the chance

 

I watch her house, quiet like a mouse

 

My friends have disappeared

 

Her neighbours think I'm weird

 

But I'd do anything just to have her near